East Indians have to put up to a lot of annoying things in everyday life. Most noteworthy among them, however, are the remarks which have a telling effect and can, by all means, make somebody lose their cool. Let us peek into some.
1. You all live in tree houses, don’t you?
Hell yes! You guessed it so right. Not only that. Our entire world floats on air. We hardly place our feet on the ground.
2. How come your English doesn’t carry ‘that’ typical accent?
Well, it’s a secret. Don’t let it out. I’ve been taking phonetics classes since the day I was born. By the way, are you sure you said that in English? It sounded quite alien to me.
3. Hey, how do you know so much about Bollywood?
Hey, don’t you know ‘The Times of India’ gets a special Bollywood edition printed exclusively for
us.
4. How do you manage to survive in the land of terrorists?
How silly! Hasn’t anyone told you that we people have got the Black Cat Commandos at our beck and call?
5. Hey, you must be seeing the one-horned rhino every day, right?
Seeing? You gotta be kidding me ma’am. What else do you think our mode of conveyance is? We ride Rhinos all the time.
6. Don’t tell me you don’t booze and huff weed.
Are you sure you are sober now and not ‘under the influence’?
7. Hey, how often do you have dog’s meat for lunch or dinner?
So much so that you won’t find a single street dog barking at you.
8. Are you a tea cultivator?
I’ll come to that a while later. First, let’s cultivate your basic ‘gyaan’. Shall we?
9. Why do most of you idolize the west?
You sound so envious mate. Do some ‘desi’ Yoga and get inner peace. Help yourself.
10. Are you familiar with Facebook?
Come again! What’s that? Is it some kind of a textbook you people follow when in need of a face lift?
